Thursday, August 23, 2012

letting them learn

You know those bad moments, the moments you try to let your kids learn from their mistakes?
We had one of those this morning and i am left with a stinky feeling because of it.

We seem to be going through a bit of a back to school adjustment with Brady right now.
He has been a little disrespectful (that alone hurts because he is not that kid) towards us.

The bus stop is basically in front of our house and the kids at the stop usually play in our yard while waiting...
He was tossing a ball back and forth with some of the kids and accidently hit one of the girls in the head. I quietly asked him to apoligize (i knew it was an accident, i just thought he should apoligize)
In his 7 yr old stubborn-ness. he claimed he didn't hit her with the ball, i was wrong/he was right, he didn't need to say sorry.
I moved him away from the kids to quietly talk, it grew from there...

It ended up with him crying and losing some of his LEGO time when he gets home from school.
I hugged him goodbye, he was a stiff board...sad and angry at us (J. was there too)
He got on the bus with his head hung down, tears still silently falling.


J. and i recently had a discussion with him regarding his disrespectfulness. In the discussion he was told there would be consequences for this type of behavior...

So...why do i feel like the consequences hurt me as much as it hurts him?

Why do i feel like i should go rent a movie to have a movie night with him, bake some cookies or get ready to be FUN MOM when he gets home from school?
Because i am a MOM and i want to make it better.

I am trying to remind myself that the blessing in disguise is that I AM making it better.
I am making it better because I am teaching him to be respectful of someone elses feelings, of us, of our rules,  I am making it better because he will be a good example for his little brother and for the kindergarten boy at the bus stop that looks up to him.

I know he didn't intend to hurt anyone with the ball.
I know it was an accident.
I know i could've just let it go.
I know he was rude to me, to us.
I know he was probably a little embarassed and that is part of the reason why he acted that way.
I know if i could've just made him say sorry, his morning would've been a lot different.
I know he doesn't usually act that way.
I know i can't wait for him to get home from school to see how his day was.

"train up a child in the way he should go;
            even when he is old he will not depart from it"
(Proverbs 22:6 ESV)

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